I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
