I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I deserve this hangover.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize