the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize