how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
