Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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