Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
