did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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