Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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