How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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