What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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