hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
