Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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