found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
