Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
