Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Randomize
