It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
