so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
