On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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