i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize