I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
