I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
