Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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