Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
wow bdsm is so cute
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize