My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Your cock deserves a montage
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
