Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
