I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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