is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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