A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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