hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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