In the future we'll all be gay
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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