drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
we made out on top of his cat.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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