new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
