uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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