I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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