his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
