Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
