I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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