i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
