And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
