its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
