I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize
