she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
