can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
