remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
i need some magic done to my vagina
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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