she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
