I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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