they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
