whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
