i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
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Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He's a Shit stain on my heart
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Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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