and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
