Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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